Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
I guess their paperwork was done...
As I put my precious Abigail to bed last night, she was telling me all about a classmate who "got a new baby" yesterday. She was very excited for this child! Then she made the comment that she guessed their paperwork was done and they could bring the baby home.
We are on this journey to bring ZiJing home and have been helping Abby mark milestones by "this paperwork" and "that paperwork"; and when its all done, we will bring her home. Soooo...I had one of those moments I've been dreading. Rather than nod in agreement, I explained to her that all babies are born to their mothers. Its just that some mommies can't take care of their babies for one reason or another and leave them in a safe place for someone to find them and adopt them. Others get to stay with their birth mommies and be raised by them. I said that was what happened with ZiJing, her mommy couldn't care for her...and that's what happened to her, Abigail.
She knows she is adopted, but she doesn't really know what that means. I admit I have avoided the whole birth mother thing. It never felt right for me to pray for this person, but I knew the time would come I needed to address it. She didn't ask ANY questions about it, and didn't understand why I was crying, but I knew the gears were grinding. The fact that she woke up in the middle of the night from a bad dream verified to me that it was in her subconscious.
Where do I go from here? Guess I'll read the part I've always skipped about the birth mommy in her "Love you like Crazycakes" book...I'm not good at this, not one.little.bit.
We are on this journey to bring ZiJing home and have been helping Abby mark milestones by "this paperwork" and "that paperwork"; and when its all done, we will bring her home. Soooo...I had one of those moments I've been dreading. Rather than nod in agreement, I explained to her that all babies are born to their mothers. Its just that some mommies can't take care of their babies for one reason or another and leave them in a safe place for someone to find them and adopt them. Others get to stay with their birth mommies and be raised by them. I said that was what happened with ZiJing, her mommy couldn't care for her...and that's what happened to her, Abigail.
She knows she is adopted, but she doesn't really know what that means. I admit I have avoided the whole birth mother thing. It never felt right for me to pray for this person, but I knew the time would come I needed to address it. She didn't ask ANY questions about it, and didn't understand why I was crying, but I knew the gears were grinding. The fact that she woke up in the middle of the night from a bad dream verified to me that it was in her subconscious.
Where do I go from here? Guess I'll read the part I've always skipped about the birth mommy in her "Love you like Crazycakes" book...I'm not good at this, not one.little.bit.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
They know us, right?
Since I started this blog to record our journey to ZiJing, might as well share. There are many steps in this process of international adoption, none for the faint of heart. Our thinking going in was that it would be "easier" this time since we did it before...they know us, right?
Well, its been one frustration after another. Our home study agency is slllloooowwww; we knew that too, but figured they know us, right? We finally crossed that hurdle and sent our paperwork to our wonderful government agency, the Hague adoption unit of the United States Immigration office. They work for us, right? We are tax payers, right? Well, our "case" was assigned to Officer Hence.
We notified him immediately after we were successful with our fingerprint walkin (see previous post), so he could move us to the front of the line, because they know us, right? He didn't return my call, so I called him the next day. He needed some clarification on our marriage certificate, the embossed seal didn't show up {after almost 27 years, really???}. I scanned and emailed him the same day so that was all good.last.Tuesday. I called him Wednesday and he stated he had received it and would approve our paperwork as soon as he could "get it off his desk". I was so stoked, two days for approval, right? Because they know us!
So, here it is Tuesday and no paperwork. I decide to call him again, surely it was just a mail issue? Let me tell you that my paperwork is still sitting on his desk, and when I asked if there was anything else he needed from us, he said no. When I asked when he thought he might get to sending us the paperwork, he clearly stated "when he could get it off his desk".
I got off the phone and hid my face in hands and cried. He knows me, right?
Well, its been one frustration after another. Our home study agency is slllloooowwww; we knew that too, but figured they know us, right? We finally crossed that hurdle and sent our paperwork to our wonderful government agency, the Hague adoption unit of the United States Immigration office. They work for us, right? We are tax payers, right? Well, our "case" was assigned to Officer Hence.
We notified him immediately after we were successful with our fingerprint walkin (see previous post), so he could move us to the front of the line, because they know us, right? He didn't return my call, so I called him the next day. He needed some clarification on our marriage certificate, the embossed seal didn't show up {after almost 27 years, really???}. I scanned and emailed him the same day so that was all good.last.Tuesday. I called him Wednesday and he stated he had received it and would approve our paperwork as soon as he could "get it off his desk". I was so stoked, two days for approval, right? Because they know us!
So, here it is Tuesday and no paperwork. I decide to call him again, surely it was just a mail issue? Let me tell you that my paperwork is still sitting on his desk, and when I asked if there was anything else he needed from us, he said no. When I asked when he thought he might get to sending us the paperwork, he clearly stated "when he could get it off his desk".
I got off the phone and hid my face in hands and cried. He knows me, right?
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Right out of Seinfeld - Biometric Finger Prints
Well as you may already know I like to be in control. So when we got our appointment to be fingerprinted for September 29th I thought "no way can we wait that long". So after asking around I decided we would just walk in and ask the folks at USCIS if they could fit us in. So yesterday that is just what we did.
We (the four adults in the house and I use the term adult loosely) walk in to the USCIS fingerprinting office in Cleveland yesterday around 2:30 and that is when the we fell into an episode of Seinfeld. There are two federal employees sitting behind a counter doing absolutely nothing. I walk up to the window and explain our appointment is not for two weeks but was wondering if they could fit us in???? The federal worker's faces just drop in disbelief and turn quite sour. The female employee states "we don't normally do that sort of thing and you should have called first". I replied, "I tried to call last week but could not locate a number". She then replies "we don't give the number out because we would have too many people calling here". WHAT, that does not make any sense I thought. After a few minutes of deliberation she says "OK, but if anyone comes with an appointment they will go immediately to the front of the line". This I could live with as they do have an appointment.
So we left the window and sat down to fill out our form. While this was going on the other federal employee gets up and goes somewhere in the back and out of sight. We are all done with our forms and no one else is in the room but us and the lady behind the window. She sits and looks angry at us for as long as it takes to wait for another person to show up. A few minutes goes by and lo and behold in walks a person with an appointment. She immediately tells us we will have to continue to wait. Meanwhile the other staffer walks back in to take care of the appointment. She continues to stare at us and it seems as though we may just sit there forever. Her point has been well received but some how I can see Jerry, George and Elaine in our shoes. Looking at each other in disbelief. She stares, we wait, she looks angry at us and we wait. Then the ice is broken, "OK I can take one of you now". My husband got up and off he went and not a minute too soon as in walked another appointment a Nun. She must have been sent from God because before long the sour puss faces were gone, we rotated with the appointments and less than an hour later we were on our way with our approvals in hand.
This was my last act of controlling the process and it felt good. Now I am trying to figure out a way to get my I800A approval completed faster. Maybe I will call our officer tomorrow and see how things are going. :)
We (the four adults in the house and I use the term adult loosely) walk in to the USCIS fingerprinting office in Cleveland yesterday around 2:30 and that is when the we fell into an episode of Seinfeld. There are two federal employees sitting behind a counter doing absolutely nothing. I walk up to the window and explain our appointment is not for two weeks but was wondering if they could fit us in???? The federal worker's faces just drop in disbelief and turn quite sour. The female employee states "we don't normally do that sort of thing and you should have called first". I replied, "I tried to call last week but could not locate a number". She then replies "we don't give the number out because we would have too many people calling here". WHAT, that does not make any sense I thought. After a few minutes of deliberation she says "OK, but if anyone comes with an appointment they will go immediately to the front of the line". This I could live with as they do have an appointment.
So we left the window and sat down to fill out our form. While this was going on the other federal employee gets up and goes somewhere in the back and out of sight. We are all done with our forms and no one else is in the room but us and the lady behind the window. She sits and looks angry at us for as long as it takes to wait for another person to show up. A few minutes goes by and lo and behold in walks a person with an appointment. She immediately tells us we will have to continue to wait. Meanwhile the other staffer walks back in to take care of the appointment. She continues to stare at us and it seems as though we may just sit there forever. Her point has been well received but some how I can see Jerry, George and Elaine in our shoes. Looking at each other in disbelief. She stares, we wait, she looks angry at us and we wait. Then the ice is broken, "OK I can take one of you now". My husband got up and off he went and not a minute too soon as in walked another appointment a Nun. She must have been sent from God because before long the sour puss faces were gone, we rotated with the appointments and less than an hour later we were on our way with our approvals in hand.
This was my last act of controlling the process and it felt good. Now I am trying to figure out a way to get my I800A approval completed faster. Maybe I will call our officer tomorrow and see how things are going. :)
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Another First
My sweet sweet Abigail started Kindergarten today.
Just typing this chokes me up.
Yeah, I know, kids start school all the time, but...not MY girl. It just reminds me just how far she's come.
A year and a half ago, we couldn't get her to even go to Sunday School.
She didn't want to leave our side, even for a minute.
The stress, the tears...then, one day she did it.
And it was good.
Just typing this chokes me up.
Yeah, I know, kids start school all the time, but...not MY girl. It just reminds me just how far she's come.
A year and a half ago, we couldn't get her to even go to Sunday School.
She didn't want to leave our side, even for a minute.
The stress, the tears...then, one day she did it.
And it was good.
So, we thought, let's try pre-school.
She would have none of it. The stress, the tears...
My girl is a control freak, by virtue of what she's risen from.
But oh.baby.
When she lets go, its so good.
She LOVED pre-school.
It was a huge step and she made a huge transformation.
Out of her shell she came.
So, the thought of starting Kindergarten was never an issue...for her.
She would have none of it. The stress, the tears...
My girl is a control freak, by virtue of what she's risen from.
But oh.baby.
When she lets go, its so good.
She LOVED pre-school.
It was a huge step and she made a huge transformation.
Out of her shell she came.
So, the thought of starting Kindergarten was never an issue...for her.
She has gone from this beautiful child, in her referral picture back on Valentines Day 2007,
to THIS beautiful child, really full of confidence (most of the time)
Hope she doesn't forget me too quickly!